Without getting into too many specifics, I’m realizing through these small slices of reality that I’m aging out of what is deemed popular today. What are these small recognitions? For starters, being called “ma’am” on a regular basis is a mild yet accepted irritant. Time is an illusion; I keep thinking the ’90s were only 10 years ago. Then there’s how my digestive system can no longer handle too many fried foods. I’m so accustomed to feeling older that when I get asked for my ID at a bar, I burst out laughing. And most recently, I’ve had the realization that my favorite music is no longer the top choice for tearing the club up.
I attended the Mom’s Dance Party. It was vibrant and fun, albeit a little steep for the ticket price (basically a $40 cover) for a dive bar located between three neighborhoods. I get it though, and it’s women supporting women. We couldn’t make the first hour, so I presumed by hour two the party would be in full crunk mode. I made some poor assumptions about this party, and here comes the ‘bothered.’ My partner best describes me at times as the person who goes to a random pizza place and wants anchovies or some other random topping, then is thoroughly disappointed and frustrated when said pizza place has no anchovies. The music played was a bit of a genre mashup; moving from reggaeton to Latin to house with a few popular hits and a dash of hip-hop. When I say dash, I mean a minuscule.
After not hearing any of my favorite hip-hop songs from the ’90s or early 2000s that would get the party going (like “The Jump Off” by Lil’ Kim, “Get Ur Freak On” by Missy Elliott, or some Aaliyah), I started to realize this was not it for me. I was even hoping for some more recent jams like “I Like It” by Cardi B or, hell, some Doechii “Anxiety” (even though the original “Somebody That I Used to Know” forever remains in my head). But nope, nada. You’ll notice I named all female artists. I do love the beats from, let’s be honest, the more misogynistic but super catchy hip-hop of the ’90s, but even excluding those, there are STILL enough women representing in the category. Instead, it trended more toward house and songs I’ve never heard. NGL, it bummed me out, and I was ready to go home by 9:30 PM. Maybe that’s also my new acceptance of being old and getting tired earlier, but I also know myself well enough to know that after a few martinis and some good vibes and beats, I can party until dawn.
I now have this half-baked idea to just take over a bar (working with them, of course) and put out an open invite to moms. I’d work with a friend to queue up the playlist. No cover, just taking over the bar with moms who have a passion for ’90s and early 2000s booty music, with some current mixes in rotation. It would be great if we could all do this as a collective. Just a basic night out, once a month, picking a random bar or even a club. We could figure out how to mix up the music and just have a space for moms to connect and dance.